Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Final hours


            I sit in my living room, lost in thought. The room is dimly lit, only a small stand lamp is on, I sit comfortably in the center of the couch, in front of me is a coffee table and on the other side of the table sits Death. He waits patiently, also sitting comfortably, but in a high back chair, matching the pattern on the couch. Death had walked in only a little while ago and sat down, a solemn look on his face. I was surprised to see that he looked like a man, not a skeleton. He wore a bowler hat, thin wire sunglasses, an old style three-piece suit, nice shoes and black leather winter gloves. He also had on a long flowing overcoat. His coat moved and swayed as if it were alive and every so often I could hear whispers from the dead coming from inside his coat. Surprisingly still, I was not afraid of him, I welcomed him into my home as if we were old friends. He didn’t say a word, he just sat, staring at me, hands on the arm rests and feet flat on the ground. His thin pale face not showing any emotion and he didn’t seem to be in a hurry, so he sat, waiting on me.

Some may say its best not to keep death waiting and to that I ask, “why?” It’s not like he can make me any more dead and I am confident that my place in the afterlife has already been secured long ago. So Death waits patiently. I might be inclined to stand up and follow him out of my home, but instead my mind wanders. It drifts back into my past. I’ve heard your life flashes before your eyes when you die, well maybe, but only if you’re in a hurry or didn’t have an interesting life. My life gently drifts in and out of my mind, like an aroma, a delicate breeze in the air that I can’t quite get a hold of.

Rain pours outside, I listen to it and relax as I am slowly being pulled back into the past. Rain falls rapidly from the night sky, I remember looking outside from the airport. My flight is delayed due to bad weather. I think about Charlotte waiting for me in Seattle, we were going to meet and I was going to propose. As the rain beat down on the building I felt my future with her being washed away. She didn’t know I loved her, not like that. We might have been dating, but I don’t think she ever truly knew how I felt. I didn’t get there till the next day. So much was dependent on me being there on time. Tears trickle down my cheek as I open my eyes, snapping back into reality. Death still lingers, still waits. He seems like a nice enough guy, I don’t know what all the bad reputation is about.

            It’s a funny thing memory, how I can remember one fleeting moment, some small detail like my friends shirt being a vibrant blue this one time at a pool party, but I can’t for the life of me remember yearly events, birthdays, anniversaries, ect. I remembers July the tenth, pool party at the house of my friend Roger. It was exactly three days before he got married. Though if you asked me when his anniversary was, I wouldn’t be able to tell you, unless I thought of the pool party days before. I remember thinking, this is the last time I will be able to see him as a free man. Last time we get to hang out and act stupid like we used to. He asked me what I thought about his future wife, I lied and said I liked her, it was the first time I ever lied to Roger.

            My thoughts drift across my entire life, I could recall every happy memories or tragic tale in my life, but I don’t feel like it. I’m not one to dwell on the past. I think over all, I had a good life. I have few regrets and I never once had to beat anyone up. I think that’s an accomplishment considering the hardheaded people I had to deal with throughout my life.

            Time has no meaning for me now, I don’t know how long I’ve been sitting here recalling my past, but I think its time to go. Time to see what the afterlife has to offer and find out if it’s as big of a deal as everyone says it is. So far, I’m not impressed. So I stand up and as if knowing what I was about to do, Death stands up at the exact same time. He smiles, happy I’m finally done reminiscing. I walk across my living room to the exit of my house, Death follows, his black coat flickering like flames and swaying as he moves. I open the door to my house, I stare out as the outside has been replaced with an endless vortex. Its hypnotizing and calming. I look back on my life one last time, smile at Death and step through the door. Death exits behind me, the door shuts and the room goes dark.

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